Ehh..so it's almost 3 and I have a 10:20 tomorrow. Oh, another couldn't hurt, now could it?!

So...I want to be able to have more meaningful entries rather than the ones that reiterate what I did for the day. I mean, I guess it's not a bad thing. I don't know where to start.

I'm looking forward to this semester after I first step foot at the first APO meeting. There's this really warm feeling and positive aura. For some reason, my collegiate career (I think I can call it that?) will feel so much more complete if I did this, and I cannot wait. I wish every other aspect of my life felt like this. I guess perhaps a number of people yearn to be part of a family of some sort whether it be within your friends or whatever social/community group or organizations you're in. It's somewhat human nature to be gregarious and enjoy that tight familial feeling. It just feels better with connecting with others. I just don't want to be thinking this because I myself am probably yearning this. No..I think some of what I said has some truth.

Oiy! Ok, so after not feeling well the first couple of weeks of school, I'm happy to report that I've recuperated significantly. I went to the health center and the final verdict is that I'm not completely 100% fine from before I started school, but I have been feeling ALOT better nontheless. This reminds me, in health psych class, we were learning how health is correlated with other factors that are psychological, like placebo effect, self-efficacy, stress and a whole lot of other stuff. The whole health, body, mind, spirit connection was too true my sophomore year in high school. That was one of the hardest years of my life, and I wouldn't want anyone to walk in my shoes that year with all the Hell I endured then. It's so fascinating though, don't you think? Of how the one time I really showed symptons this week was when I was nervous right before Deep Treble audtions. Well, yeah, I guess maybe it's not such a big deal that nerves can trigger a bunch of things in your body involuntarily, but isn't it fascinating how our whole body's system is interconnected like that? There is someone who is thinking along the same lines as me somewhere in this world and is amazed at this too right? I remember my doctor saying one time of how the body is smarter than the mind, because if there is something not good for your body or you're not treating/taking care of your body the best it could, it'll reject what it takes in. Or something like that. Hmm..maybe I should focus on what I want to major in something in this direction.

Oh, and I miss dance. I don't think I want to to Rutgers Performing Dance Company b/c well, it's not the same atmoshpere as APO and I have alot of other obligations during night time with other things I have to do and go. Whatever.

Oiy, and it's time to clock in 5 hours of sleep tonight! I need to go to bed earlier.

: )

I am so rushing for Alpha Phi Omega. There's just this positive aura in the room and I look forward to each thing that I plan to go. There's not a negative in not joining. Perhaps not getting into the a capella groups did serve it's purpose for now? Ame = estatic

Ok, so..I know I should be going to bed for my 9:50 am music class on college ave, but 10 minutes before 2 am writing in my blog won't hurt anyone. Let's see, the infamous Grace-face visited, and it was muchos fun : D . Trip to NY, even though Lindsay and I separated from Grace, Amy and Bridgette. At the end of the night when I took the train and got off by myself at the New Brunswick train station, I couldn't get to the other side of the station so that I could walk down the path I'm familiar with to the Grease Trucks. Some emo looking freshmen kids were making some wierd banana documentary, and one of the kids sitting on the bench offered to run with me to the Grease Trucks through the back alley way since that was the only way how to get there on the side of the train station I was on. He had to run because his friends were waiting for a train in the next 7 minutes to go to the next town over just to eat. Apparantly, they were really bored. So anyways, we had this brief conversation panting out of breath on our way running to the train station. He lived in the McCormick high rise and I was like, oh, I was just there last night. Oh, and another funny thing, my friend Winnie who I took the train with home who got off at Edison said she was at Rutgers, sleeping over McCormick the night before us girls went to NY. C'est interessant, non? So yeah, the point of this story was that it just made my day that some random kid would run with me to the bus stop risking missing his train. It was nice. I hope he made his train.

Sometimes, I feel lonely around here. It's alright though, because this year, I feel like I'm meeting more people. I'm getting more involved.

10 minutes has passed. Even though Ame wants to write more..Ame however must force herself to sleep for the morning classes she stupidly scheduled for every day of the week. It's not such a bad thing though because my afternoons are free. Signing off.

So

So..I decided to give this baby an update. Classes in swing, school, going out, same same. One thing I do realized is that I find myself more alone nowadays this school year. Last year with the open door policy in our freshman dorms and there were people usually around often. This year, it's more quiet, which isn't a bad thing by any means, but it means that I can't run to a nearby neighbor or a friend living next door just to talk or ask about something. I don't even know who some of the people living down the hall from us are. Oh well, it's not such a big deal.

Today I studied a good chunk in the library, and then just bummed in the dorm when I got back. I'm lazy, but at the same time, I'm sort of not. So someone I knew from high school imed me, and it was great talking to him after a long time. Only thing is, I think he needs to see someone. I mean, well, you should just meet him yourself to see what I'm talking about. Very nice individual though.

Oh, and last night, Nik called me, and then Viet got on the phone telling me to go out at 1 AM in the morning. Pshh. Sometimes I claim of how "I have no friends" : ( . I guess I do but our timings are bad and some of them are nuts.

See how boring my life is? It's alright though, because this week is full and busy of practices and audtions. I might not go to some though, even though I listed them on my little calender planner. I just need to do something! With the classes I have and how I scheduled them, there is no excuse for me to be able to do awesome academically and balance some dance/music/something anything activity that I'd like and be passionate about!

I almost forgot today was September 11. I was going to go to the Candlelight Vigil thing they were having, but then I left the dorm right at 9:30 and they were already gathered there in a small ellipse, and I didn't want to bother them. So I just kind went back up. Gosh, this whole entry has just been about me and I feel a little bad. The one thing that I thought about was my former cross-country couch. There was some important meet on that day that year that he was amping up because it was a decently competitive team that we had a chance at beating. I remember him saying how he wanted this one to go to his twin brother who died that day. Then the whole September 11 deal happened, the same day of the anniversay of his twin brother's death, and the meet was obviously cancelled. I forget if we ever did beat that team, but that just crossed my mind.

I should go to bed because I stupidly scheduled morning classes on different campuses where I have to take 2 buses. Bleh. Oh, and I met a new person in my health psych class! I hope that doesn't sound loserish if that's a word. Maybe I just need to meet new people or something.

: (

I could cry a river